Dog Days

It's my last week of summer and I don't know how to stay busy. I should be enjoying the languid moments of serenity, the endless hours of reading and basking in the sun. Moments with nothing to do but relax and be lazy, and yet I'm dying for distractions. Things to keep me occupied from contemplating a lost relationship, from remembering sweet moments and hurting over the ache in my heart; the newly opened space in my life.

Try as I might I cannot seem to arouse myself from this dreary waste that I am in. I look forward to school starting, to a new job on campus (I was hired as the secretary for BYU's preschool and kindergarten), to friends returning from summer adventures, to things to fill up these empty hours and mournful passing minutes.

I relish in the opportunities to lose myself in textbooks, lectures, arguments, spontaneous trips, misadventures, crappy food, more baking, a new house, a room to myself, new friends, new roommates, ward callings, visiting teaching, serving others, and just losing myself in life.

Being single is easy I am told. Marriage is not the answer to your problems. So I'm going to enjoy these moments of selfishness that I have. The days that I can spend only worrying about me and me and just me. I should be excited about that... right?