Being Irrational

I tend to be very irrational late at night. I don't think through things very well and sometimes just might come across as needy, irritable, and even whiny. It's quite frustrating, but I believe no one really is their best self late at night. We say crazy things, we do crazy things, we just are crazy people. And I don't mean crazy like lost-our-mind-run-around-in-our-underwear crazy, I just mean crazy like we just aren't our normal selves. We say things we wouldn't usually say, we think things we wouldn't usually think and we do things that shouldn't define us or be taken seriously in any way shape or form.

It is entertaining sometimes to stay up late and giggle with best friends and family, and yes it's fun to stay out having interesting adventures, but somehow we regret it the next day still. Right? What does it matter if I stay up facebook stalking people and blogging? I'm not all that tired and I'll be fine tomorrow. Oh wait, I forget that I'll wake up cranky, desperately wishing I could sleep in just a little bit longer. Regretting any text I sent, any secrets I told and almost always whatever I ate. I am sure I would be quite entertaining to watch on these late nights when I have to close at work or am up studying. I talk to myself a lot, and make the oddest of comments. If I am closing the store I have to find ways to keep busy which results in me dancing down the aisles before we actually close which causes judging looks from customers (I should probably stop that). I think customers love it more when I try to tell them to have a nice day (at 10:45pm) or ask them what sandwich they would like (when working grocery) or even answering the phone and saying "Fastsigns, this is Amelia."

I guess this is me resolving to count to ten before making any decisions after 10 at night. Whether it's to eat that bowl of ice cream, stay up watching a movie, or telling someone what I think of them (or emailing landlords). I am also asking for forgiveness for any complaints I make at night, for behaving a bit to needy and wanting, and for any blog posts after 11pm. Such as this one (my writing really is bad and my thoughts are sporadic and I'm not sure what I was trying to get out of this but just to laugh at myself...I think).

1-2-3-4-5-6-7-8-9-10...Yep, I'm still gonna post this.